gnutmeg | a bit of amusement

My sister got an email from Jesus, and now that I finally got her to forward it to me, I just thought I'd share it with ya'll:

From: "Jesus" <iamjesus@editedout>
To: editedout
Subject: A message from Above.
Date: Fri, 9 Jan 2004 11:23:57 -0600

Hoelle editedout.
This is Jesus. You and I - we aren't so close any more. I'm getting concerned. I watch you when you're sleeping. Uhm, anyway. I have some requests for you. I will leave $5000.00 (don't ask where I got it from. The Lord has his ways) in your sock drawer. I need you to go to to nearest Mr Big And Tall store and buy me some slacks. Size 68, extra long. I also need you to buy a dress - preferably pink and purple, size XXL. It's for uhh... well, not for me. Of course. No way that it's for me. Stop asking questions. With the remained of the money, please go to Canadian Tire (I invented that store) and get me a Slip-n-Slide, a winter tire, rubber boots, an extension cord, 4 door knobs, an axe, some paint-gun balls, long johns, and a gumball from the machine. You can keep the change, but I wantthe Canadian Tire Money back (I collect...).
So, how's church?
Please do as I say and you will be in no immediate danger. Unless I eat too many hotdogs again.. some times I just go over the edge with those hotdogs and do things I don't mean too...
Remember to say your prayers.
From your buddy, Jesus.

Ah, my sister's friends are amusing at times.